Anything Under the Sun!!!

Is love really worth all the pain?

Was watching Kareena and Saif at the Filmfare awards. I was actually feeling so irritated, the whole drama and thinking about Shahid was increasing my irritation. He wouldn’t even have bothered watching it on TV (he wasn’t there on the venue, as expected)!!! Movie stars’ love lives have never interested me much but then why was I bothered when watching Kareena coochie cooing with Saif on the stage? May be because I’m also going through the after-effects of a break-up.

Well, that explains my irritation. And my question… Is love worth all the pain?

You waste time falling in love. Going through the whole process, starting from meeting the right person, getting close, falling head-over-heels in love, realizing you want to spend your whole life with him/her, courting, talking to your parents, fighting them, realizing it’s not heading the right direction and then breaking up (can be in any order and it might differ from person to person). And after that you spend time feeling sad, crying, mourning, getting depressed (the time period here can differ too). And then you feel was it really worth it.

I know being in love is the best feeling one can ever get and falling out of it the worst. I’m still not sure if I’ve reached that stage of “love is crap”, “I don’t believe in love” or “don’t fall in love”. There is some part of me which says love’s there at least for people who are in it and who believe in it. For me it doesn’t exist any more because no more repeats for me.

Always thought mine was the matured sort of love. Yes, I was completely “in love”. Always happy, very few fights, lot of understanding, possessiveness only when required, talking about everything, being best friends, standing up to my parents (and never let the guy know what all my parents thought of him). All fairytale stuff. And then I woke up (or rather both of us woke up).

Don’t want to think what went wrong. But yes he has got out of it. Then why can’t I? More than love I guess it is the hurt feeling and the feeling that he has moved on. I don’t know how many go through the same ordeal (and I’m not even sure why I am posting this blog). But I have to get out of it and like many others I am trying my best and waiting for the “right person” again.

What do you do when you are bored with your work, homesick, friendless, lonely, etc. (yes, all this at the same time!!!)? I tried finding out solutions which are as follows,

1) Join some classes – It could range from music, dance to yoga and pottery (!!!). This would definitely help you break out of a rut and also make use of your free time. Some of it would help you feel relaxed, fit or bring out your “hidden talents”. It would also get you to meet people and might make you “friendful”.

2) Make books your friends (come on you can do that too) – Start reading lot of books. Books which interest you (that doesn’t include raunchy magazines!!!) or which might pull you out of your boredom. Even going to a bookstore and leafing through different books is a good way to pass your time (but it all depends whether you are the booky type). But visiting a bookstore could be a good way to start!!!

3) Browse through job portals (you are bored of your work, aren’t you???) - Find out if there’s something which wouldn’t get you bored too soon. This would boost your morale and make you feel that there are things which might hold your interest in work.

4) Pubs and discs – Catch hold of someone who parties and head for those pubs and discs every weekend. Believe me, it’s a very good stress reliever as well as great socializing grounds!!!

5) Last but not the least (I know it’s cliched) – Find a boyfriend / girlfriend for yourself (choose as applicable). Someone who you can go around with and have fun (see I gave it as the 5th option so don’t blame me!!!). This would not just take away your loneliness completely, it would even take away a lot of other things!!!

Well, the reason I wrote this is that I come in this category, as of now. Lets see which option would work for me!!!

If anyone asked me what’s the worst part of earning your own living, my immediate reply would be “managing my finances”.

I hate (I know hate’s a very strong word but holds good for me) managing finances. It’s beyond me to control my outflows. Some ancient, wise guy from apna India said that money should never be kept cloistered in a locker, it increases only if it’s spent. I follow it blindly. I earn, I spend.

As soon as money comes in, doors to expenditure open on their own (it’s not my fault that my friends come up with ideas of shopping, movies, trips, etc. in which I “have” to accompany them). Though I start off every month with a new budget plan, my expense column always tends to exceed my “expected contingencies” column. This being directly proportional to me not saving a penny (a paisa, for the patriotic lot!).

I have been trying to save money, but I am just not able to. Never knew saving was such a big issue. It’s really painful when you have to pay your phone bill and you realize that you don’t have enough money with you or really embarrassing if you are in a designer studio to buy something, you swipe your card and realize that “you don’t have sufficient balance” in our account. The worst would be if your best friend’s birthday comes at the end of the month.

But this time I have decided to spend carefully (I know I decide that at the beginning of every month but still). I would make my budget planner more meaningful and important part of my life (would keep it close to my heart, sigh!!!) and follow it like a bible (fingers crossed!!!).

Dhanya, the name my parents (actually my uncle chose the name!) gave me when I was born, has been tossed around mercilessly for quite a long time.

Living in the north was a torture with a name like mine. (There was a time when I used to cry that I want to change my name.) I believe the name of a person is their identity and people loved murdering my identity. Have heard all sorts of pronunciation – “dhaniya” (which means coriander in Hindi), “dhaanya” (stretching the ‘a’ actually made it similar to the word “grains” in Hindi), “dhany” (removing the ‘a’ in the end pushed me to the neuter gender) and many more. First all this mockery was drowned in tears but then it gave way to taking pains pronouncing it for everyone.

But it’s not just the North Indians who spoilt my name. Mallus (the ones from God’s own country) call me “denya”, though it is from Kerala that my name actually comes from. Tamilians call me ‘danya’ or ‘daniya’ or ‘kothamalli’ (coriander). Thankfully, I have been able to pronounce it for the rest of them before they even think of enroaching on it.

So, whats the actual way of pronouncing my name? It is “DHANYAA” with the primary stress on “dh” and secondary on “n”. Hope this would help people. The meaning of my name has been disputed for long, though, according to me, it means “the one who is blessed”. Some people say it also means “great”, “thanks”, or “Goddess Lakshmi” but I stick to the meaning I have been hearing for a long time.

Though Shakespeare said, “What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet”, the name of a person is his/her possession; something with which you can identify the person. So, people think twice and ask twice before you contemplate murder!!!

Is being fat a problem if you are healthy?

I am a bit on the heavier side of the weight scale. But I am healthy. I have a good stamina (can dance for as long as I want to), healthy eating habits, but I admit I am lazy about exercising. Does it really matter?

Guess it does. The way these weight losing clinics are gaining popularity, the whole concept of being slim is definitely rising on the priority list. Not just being slim, maybe even being thin or whatever term you want to give it. People want to look good and that’s completely agreeable, till it becomes an obssession and till they don’t look down upon people who are otherwise (people like me!!!).

I won’t say that I am not worried about being fat or rather over-weight (lets be euphemistic). I do keep thinking about it and I have tried a lot of methods. The thing is I don’t eat a lot (that’s the truth) but I run away from physical activity. I can never continue anything for a long time. Same goes for all the exercise regimes I undertake. I think that’s how it is for the most of us, though there are some really strong-willed folks who might disagree.

So, I have decided to take up something, which I am really interested in as my means of losing weight – DANCE!!! It’s the best thing I can do. I love dancing and if I can lose weight through dancing, what could be better? Any kind of dance, but would prefer western or freestyle. And for that I’ll have to join a dance class or something (my room doesn’t have so much space to accommodate my dancing).

So now my search is on for a dance class or an instructor who could help me. And once that’s accomplished, I’ll definitely come back with the results. I am all set (I hope nothing deters me from my decision this time).

This is me back to blogging after a year’s gap. Hope I dont take another break (fingers crossed). Life’s changed a lot. Finished my grad and now into my second job, in a new city. I am in Bangalore right now.

Bangalore’s a nice place. The weather’s the best thing about the place. When coming from Chennai to Bangalore I wasn’t happy at all. Had got used to Chennai. So, Bangalore wasn’t actually exciting. It didn’t seem to be my kinda place. Had heard people weren’t too friendly, very superficial n stuff like that. So you can imagine my condition. Me being the quite one (ahem ahem), who takes time to talk n stuff. Was sure I would feel all lost here.

And now it’s been one and half months. Thankfully my opinion has changed for good. People aren’t very friendly which is in fact a very good thing. No one to interfere in your matters, no one to pry into your affairs – what are you doing? why are you doing? (I hate that).  You have your life and work, you can do whatever you want to.

The auto drivers are an irritating lot (guess bangaloreans would agree with me). I have a problem with them everyday. Though there’s a meter, they have to ask for more, especially if its after dark or a long route. But I guess they are a problem everywhere.

The traffic’s another problem. Long rows of vehicles on the roads. And the huge number of messages that the radio stations get from people complaining about the traffic. It’s fun listening to these messages. But it’s no fun getting stuck in the traffic when you have to rush to some place.

Rest everything about the place is great. It’s got a cool night life (better than Chennai any day). The weather’s excellent, the people are non-interfering and if you have a good job, you can have a good time here. Just make sure to either get a bf/gf or lots of friends…

Well as i mentioned in my intro, this blog is a way to get in touch with my old classmates. I studied in St.Joseph's school,Dibiyapur,U.P. from 6th to 8th.My dad changed his job and his first posting(is there some other better word?) in Dibiyapur. It was this really small village-like place and coming from a place like Delhi(we were in Delhi b4 that) i felt completely lost there. The school was in another township of NTPC. Most of my teachers were mallus like me except our Hindi teacher, i guess. I remember most of their names. Francis sir was our class teacher in 6th, Antony sir in 7th and Joseph John sir in 8th(hope my memory serves me well).

Ya my friends!!!…Girls were Avinash(we called her Avi but her parents called her silky), then there was Varsha(whose pet name was Chhoti though she ws the tallest among girls), Vibha, Ruchi, Meenakshi, Prachi n the list goes on.. The guys were Sachin, Jitendra, Anurag, Akhilesh, Himanshu, Amar, Arindam, etc etc….

Really wish i could get in contact with them again….Hope they notice this somewhere…World moves on hope right?